‘So, how was your dive together?’ she asks, nodding towards Hugh. ‘You looked pretty cosy coming out of the water.’
I shrug my shoulders and she raises an eyebrow at me. ‘Come on, Millie. We’re on a boat in the middle of nowhere without Wi-Fi, for God’s sake. Nothing is as interesting as this budding romance. And stop staying you don’t want to be distracted!’ She playfully punches me in the arm.
‘Ugh,’ I groan. ‘Pippa, I’m not purposefully trying to be coy. I just . . .’
‘It’s soooo obvious you guys like each other.’
‘Yeah, but . . . that’s the thing. I, like, can’t like him. I mean I shouldn’t . . . I mean . . .’I can’t fall for someone who thinks I’m my sister. How would I ever explainto Millie that I destroyed her professional reputationfor a fling?
Pippa’s eyes widen. ‘Why shouldn’t you? Are you . . .’ Now it’s her turn to trail off. I can practically see the wheels in her brain turning. ‘You’re not already bloody with someone?’
‘That would be less complicated than my current situation . . . And no, actually. I broke up with my boyfriend a couple of months ago.’ My shoulders slump, it might have been a few months but it feels like a lifetime. It’s also incredibly confusing to blur my own life with Millie’s, I’m starting to feel like Andi doesn’t even exist.
‘And you don’t want to rush into things,’ Pippa supplies.
It’s easier for me to let her believe that’s the reason, even though not even the half of it. ‘Exactly,’ I agree with Pippa.
‘That’s understandable,’ she says warmly, not catching on that I’m not telling the full story. ‘But it would be a shame to miss the perfect rebound opportunity.’
‘Right,’ I say half-heartedly.
I excuse myself to rinse off. On the way, I almost thwack my head into the door frame because I’m so distracted by my conversation with Pippa. I duck around the dining table on autopilot, steadying my hand on the vinyl bench as the boat rocks with the waves.Would it be crazy to tell Pippa about the whole pretending to be Millie thing?I’m thinking, as I ease into our tiny cabin.
I notice that, for once, Hugh’s stuff is spilling out of his duffel, and I’m relieved he isn’t as neat as I thought he was. My belongings have been dumped entirely across the twin mattress.
I shimmy out of my bikini and grab for my towel, mentally preparing to have to crouch under lukewarm water and not feel like I’ve washed all the conditioner out of my hair. I’m moving slowly, still running a pros and cons list for whether or not I should tell Pippa. Pros: I won’t be in this alone and she gives good advice. Cons: I don’t actually know if I can trust her, and if I blow this, Millie will kill me.
Lost in thought, I’m still wrapping my towel around my body when I open the door to head to the shower.
The boat lurches just as I step out of my room and I fall directly on top of Hugh, somehow managing to dislodge my half-wrapped towel in the process.
Before I even process that I’m completely losing my balance, my brain only focuses on howstrongHugh is. Like some primal instinct in me is thinking,This man could save me from a mountain lion.His skin is smooth and pulled taut across his abs, which ripple up his body. My face lands right in the crook of his neck and he smells soclean,like cedar and grass and the ocean. My hands grab for the skin on his back, clutching around his broad shoulders involuntarily, pulling my body towards his. I forget that I’m dirty. I forget I need to shower. Instead, I think,Why are we not in our bedroom?I hear Hugh’s sharp intake of breath and all I can think is that I want to keep making him breathe that way.
Hugh loses his footing as the boat sways, pulling me out of my thoughts and into the present moment. He grabs for the nearest railing, saving us both from a tumble to the floor. As we hang in the balance, precariously supported by the strength of Hugh’s dazzling forearm, my brain is thinkingoh no, oh no,and my body is thinkingoh yes.Our bodies melt together – Hugh is damp and I’m sticky with seawater. I want to be touching every part of his body, but there’s a towel around his waist. My arms are wrapped around him, my towel flailing in one hand like a flag of surrender.
His hips shift beneath me, and I feel a bulge between his thighs. My nipples tighten against his chest. His breath hitches again and so does mine. For a moment we are both breathless. I wonder how I can manoeuvre off his towel and simultaneously get us closer to the privacy of our bedroom. I want to bite the inside of his neck, right above his shoulder. I want to taste him so badly that I feel a tug in between my legs, right in the heat of my belly, that pulls me towards him.
The boat lurches again, and Hugh grunts as he hoists us to a standing position. The momentum pulls my face from the crook of his neck, and our eyes meet. His eyes are narrowed and piercingly blue, his mouth open in a perfect ‘o’, the muscles in his cheek twitch.
‘Millie,’ he breathes.
Alarm bells sound off in my brain. My heart pounds in my chest.Millie.Hugh is staring at me, eyes full of desire.Millie.
I stumble backwards, my sister’s name crashing through my consciousness.Millieis what’s at stake,Millieis what’s important here.What am I thinking?
The hallway is so narrow that I’ve backed myself fully up against it. We’re still only inches from each other. ‘I’m so sorry,’ I stammer breathlessly, turning away from his torso as fast as I can, quickly wrapping myself in my towel. I gulp in air, trying to slow my racing heart. When I glance back up at Hugh, he’s eyeing me cautiously.
He opens his mouth to say something, but before he can, I speak: ‘I didn’t mean to.’ The words tumble out of my mouth. ‘I’ve gotta, um, go shower.’
Hugh’s cheeks colour red. ‘Oh . . . OK . . . I didn’t mean to . . .’
I shake my head dumbly. ‘You didn’t do anything. It was an – it was an accident.’
‘Yeah.’ Hugh nods, he isn’t meeting my gaze anymore.
‘We’re fine,’ I say, more to myself than to him.
Hugh meets my eyes this time. ‘Yep,’ he agrees, but his voice has lost any trace of emotion.
