‘Just say it, please.’ Her own nerves were fluttering now, thoughts running over what might have changed with her daughter in the past week.
‘Okay. Here goes.’ Harriet took a deep breath. ‘I don’t want to go back to London. Or school.’
‘You what?’ Pippa nearly laughed until she caught sight of Harriet’s pursed lips. Of all the worries darting through her mind, she hadn’t landed on this one. ‘Of course you do! We live there, our entire lives are in London.’
‘Not our entire lives, Mum.’ Harriet eyed her steadily. ‘We’re both making a life here, in Hartfell.’
‘Yes, but it’s temporary.’ Even though Pippa was coming to wish things were different. ‘We have to go home.’
‘But do we, really? What if I said I want to stay here?’ Harriet rushed on, pressing home her advantage in the face of Pippa’s shock. ‘There’s a high school in the next village, I’ve already looked at their Ofsted and it’s outstanding. No areas of concern. It’s a great school and they have a really strong sports ethos. I think I’d really like it there. I met Alfie’s auntie at his before camp, she’s head of year eleven. I bet she’d be happy to have a chat with us.’
‘Go to school here?’ The alarm was swiftly being replaced by panic as Pippa saw the firm resolution in Harriet’s gaze, instantly reminding her of Jonny. He would look at her like that when he wanted his own way, and he usually got it. Another thing he shared with his only grandchild. ‘But why? It doesn’t make any sense. You already go to a great school, one you really wanted.’
‘Yes, but I don’t want to go back to London. I want to stay here.’
‘Harriet, that’s absurd! You love London as much as I do.’ The pair of shorts slid from Pippa’s hands, and she barely noticed that Maud had made a nest in the pile of dirty washing. ‘We only came for a few days and yes, we’ve stayed longer than I expected, but we have to go home. I have work, you have school. You’re surely not serious? What’s brought this on?’ She narrowed her eyes. ‘Please don’t tell me your grandad is behind this. Because if he is, I’ll—’
‘He’s not, it’s all my idea. I haven’t told him anything, I wanted to speak with you first.’
Well, that made a nice change, but it didn’t solve the problem. Pippa felt ambushed, still too sated and tranquil from these past days with Gil to make any sense of this startling declaration from her daughter.
The time she’d spent with him had been wonderful and she’d tried to cling to every precious moment. Thankfully, he’d gone to collect Luca from the station so for the moment she didn’t have to disguise her feelings around Harriet. It wouldn’t be quite so easy when Gil was here and she was remembering his mouth on hers, tangled between the sheets, falling asleep in his arms.
‘Mum!Are you even listening? I said, what’s wrong with the school here?’ Harriet bent down and scooped Maud into her arms, nuzzling the puppy’s face. Maud wagged her tail and licked Harriet’s cheek with an enthusiastic pink tongue.
‘Harriet, you’re fourteen!’ Pippa came to, sharply jolted back to the present. She couldn’t indulge such nonsense; it was far too close to her own thoughts, and she needed to remind herself of the facts. ‘And about to enter your final two years at school, at the end of which you will sit your GCSEs. These are your most important years. They’re crucial and you know you need excellent results to get into the college you want. You’ve already picked it out.’
‘So? That’s exactly why now is such a good time to change. So I can settle in and get on with it.’
‘But what if you never settle and it makes you really unhappy? You know what it’s like, everyone will already have friends and you’d be landing in the middle of that, trying to find your own. And they’ll all know who your grandad is, and some won’t like you because of it.’ Pippa paused for breath, voicing another fear. ‘Does this have something to do with Alfie? Because if so, you simply can’t change your entire life for the first person you fall in love with.’
She hoped Harriet hadn’t noticed the flash of guilt. Pippa had done exactly that, and had gone one further and married him as well. But in her defence, she’d been in her twenties, not an impressionable teenager.
She leaned against the washing machine, trying to steady her racing pulse. Of all the adventures Harriet had thrown herself into since arriving in Hartfell, wanting to change schools and move here, toactuallymove her life here, had never entered Pippa’s mind. She had allowed herself a little daydream now and then, of somehow sharing a life with Harriet, Gil and the dogs, all coming home together each evening. Luca living with them when he wasn’t travelling and Joel visiting when he could. Where, and whilst Pippa did exactly what, she had no idea. Elaine had returned to the practice and she too, would retire again once it was closed.
‘I’m not in love with Alfie.’ Harriet took a selfie with Maud, smiling into her phone. ‘At least not yet, and it’s not all because of him. It’s everything, Mum. Posy, Dorothy’s, having Maud and giving her a proper home. She loves it here, it wouldn’t be fair to take her away.’
‘Harriet, it would literally be madness to move here. I’m sure Maud would settle wherever we were. And what about me, where do I feature in all this? Where would we live, what would I do?’
Pippa couldn’t drag her daydreams into a plan, they drifted in like confetti only to blow away again. Harriet, school and London were the realities she needed to hold on to so she could make herself leave this place.
‘You could be an artist, Mum. It’s what you’ve always wanted and maybe you need to be here to see that. You’re always the first to tell me to follow my dreams. I know you didn’t like it here at first, but you do now. I know you do.’
Pippa stared at her daughter, trying to snap out of her confusion as Isla entered the room, and she smiled. Isla had also changed and both girls seemed very much on the brink of adulthood. Altering the rules, making their own decisions, and she felt a rush of sympathy. Isla had lost so much, and Pippa knew how untethered Cassie sometimes felt, having single parenthood forced on her by bereavement. Was it such a terrible risk, to take a gamble in life now and then, when everything really was so uncertain and might be gone in a moment?
‘We can’t talk properly about this now, Harriet. Luca will be here soon with his dad and you two are going out.’
‘Please, Mum, just promise me you’ll think about it?’ Harriet knew exactly when to back off and her tone had become placatory as she put Maud back down in the washing and made for the door with Isla.
‘I promise to think about it,’ Pippa agreed, aware she’d just landed herself in a world of trouble. Harriet threw her a grin and both girls disappeared, promising to be back in time to eat later.
‘I can’t believe you didn’t mention how gorgeous he is.’ Cassie was stood at the window watching Gil getting out of the Land Rover with a younger version of himself, Lola bounding joyfully beside Luca, who dropped to his knees to hug her.
She fixed Pippa with a long, knowing look. ‘A seriously hot vet, sharing the house with you. You’re up to something and quite frankly you don’t even need to tell me what, it’s written all over your face. So what’s it like, sleeping with the enemy?’
‘Isn’t Luca like Gil? So tall and even more blond.’ Pippa was staring too, attempting a feeble change of subject. She was still very nervous about meeting Luca, and she gulped back her uncertainty as he hauled a bag from the back seat and shared a grin with his dad. She’d never been any good at games which involved keeping her face straight. ‘Keep your voice down, Cass, that’s the last thing Luca needs to know. And Harriet, obviously.’
‘And that hot tub. I bet you’ve never been out of it.’
