“Hush. It’s time to think of the future. A future without me in it.”
It felt like the house fell on my chest, crushing it. I couldn’t think of such a thing. I couldn’t even imagine it. I didn’t want to imagine it. Georgiana was more than family. She was… Gaia, there wasn’t a word that had been created to describe what this small brownie was to me. She’d saved me in every way someone could be saved. Even now, at the end, she was still trying to save me. I suspicioned it would be a never-ending task.
“I know you don’t want to discuss this, but we need to.” Georgiana inhaled, raising her diminished frame. The blankets covering her barely lifted. Her eyes slipped closed, and when she opened them again, they shone with determination. “I’m leaving Byx in your care.”
I jerked back, stunned. “There has to be somebody better than me.”
“There’s not. She belongs with you.”
I gripped her hands tighter. The ring Georgiana had given me quiescently sat by two others I’d crafted myself. “I can barely take care of myself, Georgiana. How do you—”
“Hush. You’ll do just fine. She’ll be safe with you.”
I tightened my fingers further. “I don’t—”
“I do. Trust me. Trust my sight. You love her.”
“As if she were my own,” I answered, my words choked with emotion.
“Byx loves you too. She’s special. Others will come for her. They’ll try and use her magic. You can’t let them do that. Only you can protect her—from others and herself.” Georgiana frowned. “There’s a chance…she might be like me. This horrible disease might be inside her too. You have to make sure she doesn’t wind up like me. You have to—”
“I’ll do everything I can. I’ll lay waste to anyone that touches a hair on her head, and I’ll figure out a way to beat this shit.” I already had an idea. Thinking of storing Georgiana’s magic came too late to help her, but might help Byx. I justneeded to find a way to weave the magic into a form that could do that.
Georgiana’s lips lifted into a fond grin. “I know you will. That’s why I’m leaving her with you. That’s why I chose you, Vander.”
The tears stinging my eyes finally fell free, slipping down my cheeks and dripping onto our clasped hands. There was no way I was worthy of this. No way Georgiana should choose me, and yet, here we were.
“I don’t want you to leave me. To leaveus,” I amended while thinking of Byx. We’d mourn differently, but our level of grief could consume us.
“I know, but this is what the magic chose for me.”
Georgiana believed in the magic the same way I believed in Gaia. Both could be cruel mistresses. Sometimes I praised Gaia, and other times I wanted to scream and rave until the walls crumbled.
“The magic can go fuck itself,” I childishly answered.
Instead of scolding me, Georgiana laughed. The sound was a pale echo of memories of her joy. “That’s my Vander. Always pushing. Always fighting. It’s why I know you’ll do everything you can for Byx.” Eyes going wider, Georgiana whispered, “I’ve seen what you can do, what you will do. The road will be difficult, but I promise you a happy destination.”
I stared at the dark ring on my finger. “That’s why you gave me this.” I raised my ringed finger.
Georgiana’s grin turned into a smirk. “Yes, well, I did say the journey would be difficult, and you are a stubborn ass at the best of times. You’ll be a fool, and you’ll have to do a fair bit of groveling, but as long as you trust the magic, you will find your peace.”
I hung my head. “And Byx?”
“Byx will be just fine, as long as she has you.”
I’d never fully understood the visions Georgiana had. Shealways called it thesight. I’d experienced hundreds of visions with Georgiana over the years, and they all looked horridly painful. She’d never once complained. I’d cursed enough for the both of us.
Thoughts of Byx were both soothing and suffocating. How was I supposed to raise a brownie child? Byx was more like the teenage version of a brownie, and if anything, that was worse. The weight of responsibility hung heavy, and yet I knew I would find a way. It was the least I could do to repay her for… My thoughts trailed off, wandering back to that dank, horrid alley she and Byx had found me in.
I can’t pay you, I’d said. Georgiana told me then that money wasn’t the only form of repayment. I hadn’t understood at the time. I did now. This was how I repaid my debt. Only it wasn’t a burden. No matter how difficult I thought raising Byx would be, I never once thought of it in those terms.
I managed to scrounge up every last drop of confidence and said, “I’ll take care of her.”
Georgiana’s knowing smile would have been answer enough. “I know you will. You’ll take care of each other.” Her eyelids slipped lower, and Georgiana’s fingers lost their grip. “I’m sorry, Vander. I’m afraid the fatigue is taking over again.”
That happened with increasing frequency. Georgiana slept far more than was normal. She was down to only being awake a few short minutes of the day. She’d stopped eating two days ago and barely drank any water. Soon she would close her eyes for the final time.
“I need to see Byx the next time I’m awake,” Georgiana said, confirming my fears.
