Orok scrubs angrily at his chin. “That’s it, though. You don’tneedit. You have issues, but you’re not broken. You can make choices and do things without my voice in your head questioning your motive. You liked kissing him?”
His coach blows her whistle, calling the players back. Orok doesn’t move.
My heart thunders, a roiling storm in my chest, in the curve of my wrists.
You liked kissing him?
No. Elethior’s…Elethior.He’s infuriating and pretentious and everything,everything,that pisses me off.
“Yes,” I whisper.
Orok grins. “Did he kiss you back?”
My face burns so hot it aches. “Yeah.”
“I know you might not believe it right now,” Orok says, “but this wasn’t a fuckup. You like the guy. You kissed him.That’swhat it is. Simple.”
“Simple?This wasn’t—itwasn’t—we can’t—”
“Tell ya what.” He knocks my shoulder with his fist. “After the Manticores secure what’s sure to be an embarrassingly elaborate win on Sunday—”
“So humble.”
“—we’ll hit the party circuit with the express intent of finding a way for you to blow off steam. What you’renotgoing to do is spiral out and punish yourself, okay? And if you thought you’d get that from me, that I’d berate you for this, well, too damn bad. You kissed someone you’re interested in, and he kissed you back. Like I said. Simple.”
He stands, and I stare at the spot he vacates, numb.
“Oh.” Orok flattens the empty water bottle. “Speaking of voices in your head, your dad called me.”
I whip an appalled look up at him. “What? What’d he want? What’d you tell him?”
“Nothing. I didn’t answer. But he left a message saying how he wants to talk to you, and could I be the voice of reason and get you to call him?” Orok’s face falls, that heartbroken deflation again. “But I don’t have to be your voice of reason, because you’re perfectly capable of making your own choices, Seb. And I’m sorry you feel like you have to question yourself.”
“It’s not because of you,” I say softly.
He smiles, just as soft, just as unconvinced.
When he gets a few steps away, a mundane detail clicks in my brain.
“I left all my stuff in the lab.”
He glances back at me, one brow lifted. “And?”
“And I can’t go back. Not—not yet.” I plaster on an utterly pathetic, wincing smile. “Can you go for me after practice and rescue my shit?”
Orok rolls his eyes up to the clouds. “Urzoth, give me strength. Yeah, I’ll go.”
“Love you.”
He bats his hand as he jogs back to the field.
And I sit there in a stupor.
I hadn’t expected him to support me. He was going to tell me I’d made a mistake. That Iamspiraling again, that it’s unfeasibly dumb to fuck around with your lab partner, especially when said lab partner rattles your heapin’ helpin’ of emotional baggage.
But if he doesn’t think this is a bad thing.
Maybe… maybe it’s not.
