and i meant the Royal We, like all of ours, not just yours and mine, so it’s really telling that that’s where your mind went.
oh god coal
Iris named the conversation “Iris and the Claus Boys, Coal Don’t Change It”
KRIS
All of ours? I don’t remember ordering a goth prince.
But, Coal, you were for sure petrified.
What’d he say to you?
Did you try to kiss him again?
yep right in the middle of the ballroom
cuz you know me, raging pervert
can’t keep it in my pants
i mean mouth. tongue in mouth.
nothing came out of my pants
or mouth
i’m going to bed
KRIS
Dude, you’re a trainwreck.
Coal named the conversation “Not Just the Stockings are Hung”
IRIS
coal!! gross
Iris named the conversation “Coal Is Overcompensating for His Tiny Candy Cane”
i beg your fucking pardon peep
did you just dick joke me
iris
iris just dick joked me kris
IRIS
you started it
KRIS
I know, I witnessed the whole thing.
As a completely innocent third party bystander, I’m declaring her the winner.
