“I don’t remember.”
“Neither do I,” Courtney said.
“So the coins might have been lost at the school?” Zoe wandered into the living room and plopped down on the sofa.
Courtney joined her and draped an arm around Zoe’s shoulder. “This is my fault.”
“Don’t say that. Listen, I tripped and fell, so the coins might have rolled somewhere.”
“I don’t think that happened,” Courtney said, glancing around. “It looks like you tore this place apart.” She stood. “Let me help you put things back together.”
Tears gathered in Zoe’s eyes. “I’m not ready to give up.”
“Okay, then let me help you. After all, I feel partly responsible.”
Zoe brushed her curls off her face. “What if the coins were lost at the school?”
“Someone would have noticed them, don’t you think?”
Zoe pulled her phone out of her pocket. “Let’s call and ask.”
“It’s a Saturday and it’s a holiday weekend.” Courtney gently pushed Zoe’s hand down. After an awkward moment, she went into the kitchen and came back out with a plate of cookies. “I’ll go to the school first thing on Monday morning.”
“Really?”
“Absolutely,” Courtney promised.
Zoe sniffed and plucked a cookie off the plate. Cookies couldn’t make the coins reappear, but they did ease the pain.
#
ETHAN SAT ON THE PEWbeside Hannah. Allison’s ghost hovered nearby. Sometimes he thought he could smell traces of her perfume hanging the air. A hundred times a day he’d catch glimpses of her in Hannah’s mannerisms and conversations. He would never be able to forget her. But could he love again?
Zoe flashed in his mind. He’d been hard on her, he knew that.
The music director, Lyle Digoni, his parents’ next-door neighbor, picked up the baton to lead the congregation in a hymn.Because I Have Been Given Much.
He used to love this song, but since Allison’s death, the words rang too true. And now they rankled. Mostly, because he didn’t think he had anything left to give. He tried to sing along. Beside him, Hannah sang in a clear sweet soprano. After clearing his throat, he was able to join in.
Pastor Parks, a man about Ethan’s age who had taken over the congregation a couple of years ago began his address.
“Although I speak in tongues
Of men and angels
I’m just sounding brass
And tinkling cymbals without love.*
“Paul is telling us that without love, we are nothing. Love is what keeps the world going around. In its purest form, it’s what makes a mother soothe a crying child, it drives a man to provide for his family, it’s what makes doing a million hard things possible. We show our love for those around us by the sacrifices we’re willing to make because we love.
Love comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes. It isn’t limited by time or distances. It transcends our mortal understandings and can only be altered and diminished in our minds and hearts. Remembering is loving. As long as we can remember, we can love. And maybe even after our minds and memories fade, love is still there.”
Pastor Parks went on to tell the story of an elderly couple who cared for each other for decades. When the woman grew too weak to lift her head, her husband would place his finger beneath her chin and lift her gaze to meet his. Even though the woman had long lost the gift of speech, she would always smile when their eyes met.
Ethan tried to muster the anger he used to feel when he thought of Allison’s death, but somehow that rage had been replaced with a peace he couldn’t describe. What had crept in to take its place? Acceptance? True, he had thought that they would grow old together. Just like he had thought he’d always be able to paint. But things change. They always do.
Pastor Parks interrupted his thoughts. He was quoting the words of another hymn.
