“Ready?” Ellie finally asks.
I waste no time sliding from the booth. She leans over to give Travis a peck on the cheek, and I head to the door, feeling eyes on my back. I don’t need to turn around to know who they belong to.
5
OLIVIA
I pushthrough the heavy wooden doors of my business class building and let out a relieved breath.
I’m done.
My last final is over. The weight has been lifted. I’ve always done well in school, but that doesn’t do anything to stop the persistent, nagging worry that I’m not good enough. My mother ingrained the need to be perfect into my sister’s and my brains before we were old enough to walk. And if I fall short, then I might as well have failed.
A few snow flurries start to fall as I make my way to the student parking lot. I tug my pea coat tighter around me to ward off the chill. As much as I hate the cold, everything here is so much prettier under a crisp layer of snow.
One of the reasons I fell in love with this campus when I was touring colleges was the feeling I got when I strolled through the grounds. The castle-like buildings that towered over me, slightly intimidating, yet welcoming. The beautiful trees that turn stunning shades of red, orange, and yellow in the fall—my favorite time of year. The crisp, fresh air wasn’t salty atall. Growing up near the beach, I’d gotten a vast expanse of sky and a picturesque shoreline, but snow brings a different beauty to the world. It makes everything peaceful, even if it’s slightly messy. It reminds me that sometimes there’s beauty in chaos.
I’d visited several great schools before Brown, but none of them felt quite right. The fact that it was a thousand miles away from my suffocating mother was just a bonus. I was at home instantly. I could be whoever I wanted here. At least that’s what I told myself. I’ve yet to follow through, and I’m almost finished. I’ve had every opportunity at my fingertips with Ellie as my BFF. You’d think some of her super cool badass ways would’ve rubbed off on me by now, but I still can’t shake the need to be the perfect daughter.
Maybe one day.
I approach my car and hit the remote start just as my phone starts ringing. My mother’s name flashes across my screen. I consider letting it go to voicemail, then think better of it. She’ll keep calling.
“Hello.”
“Hello, Livvy, how was your final?”
I climb in my car, bouncing in place while I wait for my seat warmers to kick in. “I think it went well.”
“Hopefully better than the last one. I know you can do better than a ninety-four, Olivia. Have you been staying out late?”
I grind my teeth to keep from arguing. “No.”
“Good. We can’t wait until you are home. See you soon.”
“Bye.” I hang up and toss my phone on the seat. The urge to bang my head on the steering wheel passes after a few deep breaths. I thought I’d mastered the art of Elizabeth Whittington, but she surprises me constantly with how well she can get under my skin. Moving back home in a few short months is going to be torture.
Ellie is bundled up on the couch watching Netflix when I enter our apartment.
“Hey,” I say, placing my keys on the entry table.
“Hey, how was it?”
“It was fine. I can’t believe we’re almost done.” I plop down beside her.
She throws her blanket over my legs and pauses the show. “I know. It seems like yesterday we were in that crummy little dorm room meeting for the first time. God, I hated those things.” She laughs at the memory.
I was terrified of having a roommate. In high school, I was too busy studying and terrible at making friends. I begged my dad to get me my own place, but he was adamant that I needed to experience my first year of college like everyone else.
Thankfully, I hit the roommate lottery. Ellie and I clicked immediately and have been inseparable ever since. We’re total opposites, but it works for us.
In our sophomore year, we moved into this apartment. Finding a two-bedroom, two-bath apartment within walking distance of campus wasn’t cheap. Since neither of us works, our parents agreed to split the cost as long as we kept up our grades, which we have.
“Are you moving out immediately after graduation?” she asks.
We haven’t talked much about the reality we’re facing in a few short months. We’ve both been avoiding it and pretending we can continue living just as we are without anything changing. Which I know is impossible.
I sigh, resting my head against her shoulder. “I’d love to stay until the lease is up.”
