I gnaw on my bottom lip, steeling my nerve to ask the question I’ve wanted to ask since our first date. “What is thisexactly?” I point between the two of us.
“What do you want it to be?”
“I don’t know. I like hanging out with you, but I’m not sure I can commit to anything serious right now.” We shouldn’t put a label on something that has an expiration date. I’m leaving in a few months, and he could leave at any time to go on tour. “I don’t know what my plans are after graduation, and I need to focus on that.”
He nods but stays quiet, so I continue. “I know the band is your top priority, and I don’t want to get in the way of that.” His face remains impassive, giving me no clue what he’s thinking, and word vomit continues to spew from my mouth. “We don’t have to put a label on anything, right? We can still keep doing what we’re doing?”
“Sure.”
My eyes widen. “Sure?”
He grins, taking my hand. “I like you, Olivia, but I have no idea where I’m going to be one week to the next. My lifeisthe band right now. I know you have your own shit to sort out and Iwouldn’t want to hold you back, but for now, you’re mine.” He leans in and presses a soft kiss to my lips.
The sound of being his sounds a little too good. I’m in dangerous territory. Getting attached to him is a terrible idea, but I’m not ready to give him up yet.
I have four months left here and I’m going to make the most of it.
23
PENN
Olivia looked so fuckin’cute trying to eat pizza like a proper princess. She asked me for a fork, but I told her I didn’t have any. She stared at me like I was crazy and probably knew I was lying, but who the fuck eats pizza with a fork?
She sat beside me on my couch with her legs crossed, taking small bites and dabbing her face with a napkin. I put away four slices before she even finished one.
Now she’s stretched out, her legs in my lap as she watches some girly show. But I’m watching her. Always her.
Her eyes get heavier and heavier, and when they eventually close, I grab a notebook off my table. Words flow onto the page, turning to lyrics almost effortlessly. When my hand starts to cramp, I toss the book aside and check my phone. Shit. It’s after eight. She has an early class tomorrow.
I brush the hair away from her face and stroke her cheek. “Wake up, Barbie.”
A crease forms between her brows, and her eyelids flutter open. “Hm? Oh.” She sits up with a shy smile. “Sorry.”
“It’s getting late. I know you have class tomorrow.”
She stands up. “Yeah, I better go.”
I walk her to the door, but we’re hit with a blast of cold air as soon as I open it. “Fuck.” I shiver as I step onto the deck. Big, fat, white flakes are falling rapidly. There’s already a layer covering my steps and the parking lot.
“I thought it wasn’t supposed to start until later,” Olivia says, stepping outside behind me.
“Me too. You can’t drive in this.” I usher her back into the warmth of my apartment. “I can drive you in my truck, then pick you up in the morning and take you to class.”
“Oh, um, you don’t have to do that. It’s fine. I’ll go slow.”
It was barely flurrying when we left Travis’s, and she drove ten miles under the speed limit, white knuckling the wheel and practically sitting on the dash.
“It’s freezing. There will be ice everywhere.”
She nods, twirling a strand of hair around her finger. “Yeah, but you have band practice tomorrow.”
“It’s fine.” I grab my keys, but she still doesn’t move.
“What if I stay here? I mean, hopefully they clear the roads before I need to leave for class. I can sleep in your guest room.” She blurts out that last part, and I laugh, causing her to wince.
I cup her jaw between my hands. “I’m not laughing at you. I’m laughing because you think I’d let you sleep anywhere other than my bed.” I kiss her nose, and she smiles, cheeks turning that shade of pink that I love.
“I don’t have any of my things. I don’t even have a toothbrush.”
