He motioned for us to sit, but when I refused, he sat first, anxiously. He cleared his throat, but the words wouldn’t come.
I was the first to break the silence. “What happened to you?” I asked bluntly.
“I-I…” He swallowed and licked his dry lips. The rebels standing guard looked pained. I examined their faces. Jinya was nowhere to be found.
The back of my neck tingled in a sudden premonition. I glanced at Lei, his eyes steely with understanding. He’d guessed too.
Kuro cleared his throat again. “I lost Jinya,” he said, his voice breaking at her name. All at once, the words poured out of him. “She disappeared eleven days ago. There’s no trace of her anywhere.”
“The spirit realm,” I guessed. “Have you tried the spirit realm?”
“I’ve tried every day. I’ve walked the forests and the plateaus and the mountains. But it’s too slow. If you help me—”
His choice of words was strange. “You’vewalked? Have you not tried impulsion?” I asked, recalling how I’d located Chancellor Sima in the spirit realm, during the war.
“What’s that?” Kuro asked, and I raised a brow.
He flushed crimson. “Apologies for not being as learned as you, my lady,” he bit out. “Not everyone had the privilege of growing up in the imperial palace.”
“I didn’t grow up in the palace,” I snapped, though I understood toKuro, it hardly made a difference. I’d grown up a noble, and he’d grown up a commoner.
“Impulsion is a way of infiltrating the emotions and thoughts of another,” I said. “If you use your spirit power—”
At this, he seemed to deflate. When he spoke, his voice was small. “It’s no use, then. I’ve tried to call on Baihu, but she does not answer.”
“That’s impossible,” I said, astonished. Even when the dragon and I were feuding, he had never been able to restrict my powers before.
“We are bound to each other. If she stops using her powers, so must I.” He exhaled sharply. “I think she’s gone into hibernation. Before she left, she told me she had no desire to play any part in the veil’s destruction.”
My mouth fell open. How selfish of her, then, to abandon us to our own ruination. If she was truly so noble, why didn’t she help us? Why didn’t she intervene with her great power?
But in fleeing to the eternal spring, wasn’t I doing the very same thing?
“Y-you were right,” Kuro said brokenly. “I opened too many gates. I should have been more careful. Jinya…Jinya didn’t want to make a bargain with a spirit. She had no interest in lixia. But…you know how hard it is to resist.”
I narrowed my eyes. “To resist what?”
He swallowed again. “The lure of power.”
“Are you blaming her?” I asked.
“N-no!” he cried out, gesticulating wildly. “I-I only…You of all people must understand. When I accepted Baihu’s seal, she fed on my pride. She nurtured it within me—like a pig for slaughter.” He let out a broken laugh. “I changed. I thought I could do no wrong. I refused to listen to anyone who disagreed with me. Even when Baihu and I started clashing, when I began tearing more rifts in theveil, even then I believed I no longer needed her. I-I changed,” he said again. “I don’t know how to go back.”
“You can’t go back,” I said harshly.
“Please.” He stood, reaching for me. I tightened my grip on my blade, intimidated by his stature despite the frail, pleading emotion in his eyes. “Please, my friend, help me. I’ll do anything—give you anything. I just—I need to find her. I need to make things right.”
Then, to everyone’s shock, he got down on one knee, and then the other. Trembling, he kowtowed before me. I could almost imagine Baihu’s presence in the room with us, bristling with humiliation and affront. The spirit of the Ivory Tiger, the West Wind, who drew upon pride and arrogance for power…and here was her human vessel, fighting against her very nature.
Kuro stood a chance, I realized. He was not subsumed yet. Indeed, when he raised his eyes to meet mine, I could see the natural shades of black within them, flickering against the gold. The realization was followed by piercing jealousy. Was his willpower stronger than my own, or was it his sheer desire to live?
But if Kuro could do it, if Kuro could stand against his master—so could I. I was not lost either. Not yet.
If I used my lixia, I would upset my already depleted life force. And yet Kuro had saved Lei’s life. He’d twice spared me. It was true I had only a few months left to live as a free person. But if Jinya was lost in the spirit realm, she had none.
“All right,” I said, and the tension seemed to ease from the room. Lily smiled, the other rebels sighed, and Kuro, to my infinite astonishment, began to weep. Only Lei appraised me in his impassive way, a knowing glint in his eyes.
I wondered if he could read my thoughts. Because there was another, more selfish motive I had in mind: I wanted to see my mother again.
