But she had already vanished into the night.
Twenty-two
It is a good position—the mistress of the house is kind and generous, and the pay is well above market rate. Only, take care never to enter the upstairs quarters at the far end of the stairwell. Other maids have tried, and all have either gone mad or disappeared. They say the previous mistress of the house lost her mind in those very rooms, and the shadow still lingers. If you take the job, never open that door.
—Private instruction from Yu Xiuying’s former housekeeper, 924
Time was of the essence;I had to set out immediately, before the ghosts of the night’s events could catch up with me. And yet, though I feared any delay, I could not go without saying goodbye to my family. Not if this was possibly my last night in Chuang Ning.
Following muscle memory, I climbed the low-hanging eaves and ran across the rooftops to Willow District. The sky was awash with stars, and I had never so dearly missed being alive. Knowing I would lose myself in six months’ time only intensified the richness of life today: the firecracker ash in the air, the crumpled lanterns colliding in the breeze, the sugary scent of sweet rice cakes and peanut cookies. Chuang Ning, despite all its flaws, despite how much I had hated living here, was still my home.
The house was dark as I crept inside, stealing in through the upstairs window as I used to long ago. It felt surreal to be back here, to breathe in these childhood smells, to step on floorboards that stillcreaked in the same places. Tiptoeing down the corridor, I avoided Father’s end of the house and instead went to Xiuying’s room, gratified to find candlelight pooling beneath her door.
I knocked once, then entered. Xiuying was sewing by candlelight, repairing a dress that was too big to be worn by Rouha. And then I remembered, Rouha had grown.
“Meilin!” Xiuying gasped, dropping her sewing. “How are you here? Prince Liu said you couldn’t leave the palace until—”
“I wanted to see you,” I choked out. “Sister.”
Her arms came around me and I felt myself shatter, all my carefully maintained armor falling apart at the warmth of her touch. We cried in each other’s arms, for minutes or hours I couldn’t say. There were so many things I wanted to tell her, so many ways I wished to sayyou were right, andthank you, andI’m sorry, I’m sorrya thousand times.
“It’s been…so hard.” I sobbed like a little girl again, like I was twelve and my mother had just left me. “I’ve made so many mistakes. I’ve done—terrible things—”
“Shh…” Xiuying patted the back of my head. “It’s okay. It’s okay.”
The door squealed as it opened a second time. “Jie Jie?”
I dried my eyes as I caught sight of Rouha and Plum by the threshold, staring at me as if they’d seen a ghost. Plum ran toward me first, giggling.
“You’ve gotten so big!” I cried out, lifting him in the air and groaning from the weight of him. Rouha tackled my legs and I nearly fell over, before Xiuying righted us both.
“Your hair!” I exclaimed, looking at Rouha’s shorn braids, which now reached just below her ears.
“The style’s in vogue,” Xiuying said, her eyes twinkling. “Because of a certain woman warrior, the rumors say.”
I shot her an incredulous look before bending down to listen to Plum teach me every new word he’d learned in my absence.
“Why don’t you stay?” Rouha whined, interrupting Plum. “It’s boring without you.”
“Rouha, we talked about this,” Xiuying chided. “Meilin has to attend to her duties in the palace—with the prince, remember? You liked him.”
“He can come live here with us,” Rouha protested. “He can stay in Father’s rooms soon.” To me, she said in a stage whisper, “Father’s dying.”
I glanced questioningly at Xiuying, who gave me a curt nod.
“It’s not proper for the prince to live here,” said Xiuying. “But we can visit Meilin one day in the palace—wouldn’t you like to see the palace?”
“I don’t like the palace,” said Rouha, pouting. “I want to travel the world—like you did, Jie Jie.”
I shot Xiuying a look of horror, and she grimaced in response.
“Me too!” said Plum, before biting into something on my arm. I yelped with surprise before noticing he’d torn my makeshift bandage. Xiuying, noticing the wound, got up to rebind it and assemble an herbal remedy for me. So she was downstairs when a knock sounded at the front door.
My insides writhed with coiling dread. Anything amiss was sure to be because of me. “Stay here,” I ordered Plum and Rouha, my vision tunneling. “No matter what happens, do not leave this room.
“Rouha.” I squeezed her hand, trying to sound calm. “You’re in charge now.” My younger sister was growing up to be a clever child with observation skills well beyond her years. I trusted her to keep Plum hidden in the presence of danger.
With that I hurried down the stairs toward the hushed voicesin the entrance, imagining the worst. But as I neared, I recognized the newcomer’s voice and breathed out an immense sigh of relief. It was Sky.
