I turn my head and kiss his shoulder. ‘What you did for Mr Harrington was humane, Dad. You gave him a gift that no one else was willing to give him. You gave him time. Time to play with his daughters, time to say goodbye properly.’
‘I wish I could help him now, Scarlett.’
The next day, Dad came home from work. Gareth had died in his bed, peaceful, with his family around him.
16
The hospital is even grimmer than last night, if that’s possible. The grey, overcast sky shadows the corridors. Sandy and I are amongst the first visitors and if it weren’t for the occasional laughter of the nurses at their station, my dad’s ward would be deathly quiet.
‘Hi, Dad,’ I whisper, kissing his scalp.
The deposits in his catheter bag are dark and there’s a yellow cast to his skin that I haven’t seen before. I’ve called in a working-from-home day, but I have no desire to look at work. Sandy and I nestle into two seats on either side of my dad’s bed. We sit and we watch him. We take it in turns to make a coffee trip or a toilet trip, never leaving him alone. We exchange pleasantries with the nurses as they pass through to check on their patient. One nurse tells us the doctor will be doing his rounds in the early afternoon and he intends to discuss Dad’s condition with us.
Amanda turns up on her lunch hour with two big bags of goodies: sandwiches, muffins, chocolate bars, pastries. A nurse brings in a third chair and Amanda tells ridiculous stories that seem to keep the three of us laughing continuously for an hour. She tells Sandy about her new casual relationship with Williams as if Sandy is her best friend. I cringe, hoping my dad can’t hear. ‘Anyway, you’ve had your head in files all week but don’t think I’ve forgotten that you never told me what happened after the charity gala,’ she says through a bite of brownie. ‘It didn’t go unnoticed that you and Gregory left together right after that steamy dance. They didn’t even say goodbye, you know, Sandy.’
Sandy raises a brow above the walnut whip that’s half in and half out of her mouth. She and Amanda share a cheeky giggle.
‘Gregory didn’t come back?’ I ask.
Amanda shakes her head as she munches down on a double chocolate chip cookie.
I have to fight from closing my eyes and rolling my head back, remembering that dance and the press of his lips against the skin of my neck in the hollow by my collarbone.
‘I honestly can’t tell you where he went but we didn’t leave together. We had a row and I left. I thought he would’ve carried on with the party.’
‘You had a row? But you looked so into each other. He couldn’t get enough of you. At one point, Sandy, I thought he was going to take her right there on the table in front of everyone.’
‘Bloody hell, Amanda!’ I exclaim.
Sandy laughs heartily through the last bite of her walnut whip.
‘Oh come on, Scarlett, we’re not three years old,’ Amanda says, rolling her eyes and wiping chocolate remnants from the side of her mouth.
‘Still, you can’t say things like that. What if my dad can hear you? Pass me some of those goodies.’
Amanda throws a cookie from her side of the bed to mine.
‘So, you had a fight, what about?’ Amanda probes.
I want to tell her but I can’t. I can’t betray Gregory and I can’t tell her that I willingly closed that deal, knowing what I know.
‘Something and nothing.’
I walk Amanda out to her car after lunch, turning on my phone for the first time today. As I’m waving her off, I listen to my voicemails, ignoring all but one.
‘Scarlett, I didn’t get a chance to say how sorry I am about your dad. I can only imagine how you’re feeling and I’d like to help in any way I can. I thought, if you’d let me, I could take you out tonight. Make up for last night and take your mind off things. I’d like to do this, Scarlett. Please.’
What would you make of Gregory Ryans, Dad?
I knew or hoped somewhere inside me that Gregory wasn’t offering the usual completion meeting last night. The norm would be all clients, Lawrence, Williams and Gregory, going for dinner. Toasting the latest addition to their empire. I think part of me wanted him to be offering dinner alone, just the two of us, and the other part of me wouldn’t dare to think it. He’s insanely attractive and wealthy; he could have any woman he wants. Sure, that’s part of it. The other part is that, I knew last night and I know now, if I’m alone in a room with that man, client or not, I won’t be able to resist the effect he has on me.
My reasons for saying yes last night still stand. I have questions to ask him.
And, God, I want to go and see that face, drown in that scent, be close to the heat of his body again.
‘Just go,’ Sandy snaps when I’m back at my dad’s bedside, my legs crossed beneath me in the chair.
I stop twisting my bottom lip in my fingers. ‘No.’ I sound much more emphatic than I feel.
