I nod.
‘Scarlett, I know you and I know how you’ve been brought up. I know the person you are and whatever this thing is, I know you’ll make the right decision. Just remember that you haven’t known this Gregory chap for long. It’s a tough time at the moment, with your dad, and I understand Gregory is wealthy and?—’
‘It’s not about that, Sandy, I promise. He’s more than that, much more, I think.’ The words seem for the first time to be real when I say them aloud. ‘I want to help him, I really do, more than anything, but I know it’s wrong. I can’t explain why I want to help him so much. It doesn’t make sense. It probably doesn’t even matter after last night.’
Sandy suppresses a smile behind her cup.
‘Did you really say “chap”?’ I tease, changing the subject.
‘What’s wrong with “chap”?’
‘Nothing, nothing at all, it’s very happening.’
She clips me playfully with a tea towel. ‘Be quiet, you. It’s hard to be happening in your forties.’
‘I can see that.’ I laugh.
Sandy hangs the tea towel onto the rail of the range oven door then walks behind me and places one hand on my shoulder. ‘I’m sure you’ll make the right decision. I’m going to see if your dad is ready for breakfast.’
I think about everything my dad has ever done for me and all the things the little boy from my dream didn’t have. His childhood blackened undeservedly. It hurts me that my mother left and didn’t want me. I can’t imagine how awful it must’ve been for Gregory to see the things he saw.
If you mean as much to that person as they do to you, perhaps they shouldn’t have asked you to do something that wasn’t really right in the first place. He didn’t. He owned the truth and gave me the opportunity to walk away from the deal.
Maybe he does care for me.
12
It’s Monday and time to deal with the hangover from Friday night. I pull up an email from Gregory and dial his number. It’s before nine in the morning and I wonder if he’ll be in the office. My heart is beating so fast, I feel my blood pulsing in my head. Not helped by the incredibly annoying hold music. The weight of my decision draws my hands to my temples, as I wonder for the last time whether I’m about to do the right thing.
His face appears on my screen. ‘Scarlett.’
‘Hi.’
‘I didn’t know if I’d hear from you again.’
I’ve turned myself inside and out for two days and now the moment is here.
‘I need to return my dress.’
His exhale is louder than he probably intends it be through my headphones. ‘It’s yours; keep it. No one else would do it justice. Is that the reason you called?’ There’s disappointment written all over his face: the confirmation I needed. I won’t be another person who lets him down.
‘No. I – I wanted to let you know that I’ll finish my markup of the Sale and Purchase Agreement and send the latest version to you before lunch. If you’re free, we can walk through the changes this afternoon.’
‘You’re going to stick with us?’
‘No. I’m going to stick with you.’
After a silence he says, ‘Thank you, Scarlett.’
Even through the computer, I know he’s looking directly at me, I feel it. I could listen to my name slip from his tongue a thousand times a day and never tire of it. But that’s not the deal I made with myself and after this transaction closes, he won’t be saying my name again.
The usual receptionist snarls at me and flashes a toothy grin to Jack then leads us, Jack first, keenly following her perfectly formed arse, to the Eclectic boardroom. Before I have a chance to say hello to Lawrence and Williams, who are already sitting at the table, a hand grabs the bare flesh of my wrist. The sensation ignites my skin, telling me instantly who it is. My body reacts before my mind. I stagger back against the glass pane of the empty office adjacent to the boardroom. Everything I felt on Friday night as he held my body to his and moved us around the dance floor is still there, as I stare at his lips.
‘I just want to say thank you.’
His face is close to mine, closer than it ought to be. My mind feels dizzy with his proximity and I think I could break even my own rules. But…
‘Gregory, you should know that I’m here as your lawyer. Only your lawyer. What Pearson did… no child should have to see that. But after this deal, I think you should find another lawyer.’
