“Mental illness?”
He shook his head, feeling the suffocating band of anger and humiliation tighten around him. “He was a career army man, close to retirement age. They were based outside of DC at the time. My mom had her eye on an RV. She’d traveled the world but wanted to see the United States.”
“That’s sweet.”
“Yeah,” he agreed. “She was a sweetheart. The perfect army wife. She could make the most basic military housing feel like home. Then my dad was arrested.”
“For what?”
“He was charged with conspiracy and bribery. There was a ring of officers being bribed by a defense contractor in the Middle East. They gave him classified and confidential information that he used to defraud the US military and he offered...” Cole paused, shook his head “...a lot of things in return. Apparently it had been going on for years, and he was one of the ringleaders. He denied everything, but the government had enough evidence.”
Sienna placed a hand on his leg. His skin burned beneath the fabric of his jeans where the warmth of her seeped through.
“Mom posted bail, and he came home. The next week, he shot himself.”
“No,” Sienna whispered. “Did she—?”
“I found him,” he said. “Mom had asked my brother and me to fly in. She thought seeing the two of us would bolster his spirits. She’d come to pick me up at the airport. Shep was arriving that night. There was a note on the door when we got back to the house that I should come in without her.”
“I can’t even imagine, Cole. I’m so sorry.”
He shrugged, trying to stay strong. He’d become immune to sympathy in the weeks following his father’s death because at that time the kind remarks were always laced with a trace of judgment.
Almost everyone in his parents’ circle of friends was or had been military at some point. The accusations against his father, and the fact that his suicide seemed tantamount to admitting guilt, were a hard pill to swallow for some people. Most people.
The question of the kind of man his father truly was had driven a wedge between Cole and his twin. Shep had always been a free spirit, the family rebel and the brother who’d given their parents the most trouble growing up. He’d felt somehow justified in his choices after Richard Bennett’s years of treachery had been revealed.
Cole, who at the time was stationed in Texas, proud to follow in his father’s footsteps with his own military career, had been knocked so far off center he wasn’t sure he’d ever right himself again. Despite the mountain of evidence, including emails and other correspondence that implicated Colonel Bennett, Cole still wanted to believe his dad could be innocent.
“The worst was mom’s reaction,” Cole told her, keeping his voice neutral as emotions buffeted him from every side. “She was his biggest supporter. She’d been so proud of his service. Even after the arrest, she insisted he’d been framed. She wanted him to be the honorable man she’d married but would have stood by his side no matter the outcome.”
“He didn’t give her that choice,” Sienna said quietly.
“She felt like he’d abandoned her. It didn’t help that Shep was doing the ‘I told you so’ routine every waking minute. Her pain didn’t seem to phase him at all.”
She squeezed his leg. “That couldn’t have gone over well with you. It’s obvious you were protective of your mom.”
“Picture the most generous, selfless, caring person you can imagine, then multiply by ten. That was my mom.”
“You were lucky.”
“So was Shep. I still don’t get how we could have had the same parents, the same childhood, most of the same experiences and his take on everything was the polar opposite of mine.”
“I can’t answer that,” Sienna said. “Jase and I obviously had different upbringings, at least for most of it. Did you finally get your brother to come around?”
Cole shook his head. “We got in a fight at Dad’s funeral. Both of us ended up with black eyes, and he had a split lip to go with it. Never could block a shot. Mom blamed us both.” He closed his eyes as memory and regret coalesced inside his chest. “Shep left that night. I haven’t talked to him since.”
“What about when your mom died?” Sienna asked.
He pressed his lips together, then said, “He didn’t come back, and I did a private burial. Without Shep, it was only me there. I couldn’t stand the idea of her family and friends judging her in death at a big service.”
“You don’t know—”
“I do,” he insisted. “It was awful for her, and she had no one with Dad gone.”
“She had you.”
He stood, paced a few steps forward and plucked a stone from the creek bank, hurling it toward the river. It skipped across the water twice, then disappeared into the current with a plop.
