“Just tired.”
“Traveling can be a lot. Why don’t you take a nap before we go exploring?”
“Yeah, maybe.”
“You love to hold it in until you’re bursting at the seams, why is that?” Sawyer asked me, an amused look on his face. He already knew me too well in the little time we’ve spent together.
“I don’t know, okay?” I buried my nose in my warm mug. “I don’t want to burden others, so I try to deal with shit myself. But eventually, I need to get it out, usually by venting or crying.”
“You’re never a burden to me. You can tell me anything and let me help you carry the load. Don’t feel you ever have to hold back.”
“How?”
Sawyer blinked, his expression one of confusion. “What do you mean?”
“How are you even real?” I set my mug down and stood from my chair. “This whole thing, this whole set up, this wholeway of life, it’s not real, Sawyer. It’s not based in reality. Who gets to travel carefree and not have to worry about a job, or rent, or other bills? Who meets a random woman and asks her to come travel with him? Who is so open and honest and caring to someone they don’t even know?”
“It’s my reality, Leilani.” Sawyer’s voice cracked and my stomach free falled. “Yeah, it looks like all rainbows and butterflies from the outside but it’s not. I fell off a ladder at a job I dedicated my entire life too, and it was devastating. A horrible blow to both my self-confidence and my life. For months, I didn’t know what to do with myself. I wandered around aimlessly, like a lost soul. But then I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself and get out there and take the world by the balls. So, I did. And now, meeting you, it feels like it was meant to be. You want to travel and photograph the world. I want to give that to you. I really like you. Wait, fuck, I mean…I took one look at you and knew you were going to be mine. And now, the more time we spend together, the more I fall in love with you.”
I sat back down with a thud, a tidal wave of emotion taking me under and pulling me down. My mouth opened but no words tumbled out.
Sawyer placed his mug down next to me, leaned forward, and took my hands in his. “Whether you want to believe it or not, this is real. I’m real. You’re real. Our life together could be real.”
Tears filled my eyes and leaked out of the corners, spilling down my cheeks.
“If you don’t feel the same, you can tell me. I’d still like you as my travel companion, though I can’t promise I won’t try to kiss you.”
I laughed and cried at the same time. I studied him from head to toe, this perfect man I stumbled upon, and the storm inside my head began to simmer down.
“My mama raised a good one. I just wish she were still here to see it.”
“I’m sorry, Sawyer.”
“Thank you. But that’s another conversation for another day.”
I released one of his hands and lifted mine to his cheek, caressing his soft beard. He closed his eyes and leaned into my touch.
Moments passed by the silence stretching between us. “It scares the ever living shit out of me, but I’m falling for you, too.”
Sawyer’s body relaxed and pure happiness radiated over his handsome features. He grabbed the back of my head and pulled me in for a deep, earth-shattering kiss, the fire still roaring next to us.
We kissed and kissed and kissed some more until our lips were swollen and tingling in the best way. After breakfast, we showered and headed out for pictures before settling down at the campground for one more night.
With the back doors open, we laid in each other’s arms inside the van and counted the stars, so many shining bright. Between stolen kisses and hands roaming under the blankets, I felt like a teenager again, my hormones raging.
But eventually, sleep overtook us, and we drifted off in each other’s arms.
CHAPTER FIVE
Sawyer
We madeit to the next town of Heartstone, Missouri, which oozed small town charm in every way.
We took a walk in Lover’s Stroll Park and hit up the amusement park at nightfall. Leilani captured amazing shots of the large Ferris wheel all lit up with the stormy night sky in the background.
Thankfully, the storms held off until we made it safely back to the van. Betsy hated the thunder, and I always felt bad for her when got really loud.
After a couple of days in the small town, we set off to Tennessee, hoping to eat some good BBQ food. The town was full of tourist shops, with lots of little trinkets to buy and collect, along with t-shirts and various other swag like items.
