He could forget every lesson he’d ever learned and try to make something work. He could believe and be crushed. He could let this destroy them both, as it no doubt would.
Or he could find his wits, his smarts, and do the right thing.
The thing that would save them both.
She was the only person he’d ever successfully saved. He could not continue on this path without saving her one last time.
And suddenly, watching her hum as she cooked them dinner, he realized what must be done. It was reckless. Shortsighted.
Necessary.
He stood from the chair he’d been sitting in abruptly. “I’m going to my club tonight,” he announced, perhaps a bit overloud and out of the blue. “I have business to attend to.”
“Would you like me to join you?” she asked, still focusing on whatever she was making in the skillet in front of her.
For a moment, he stared at her back.Join you. Yes, that was what hewould like. Her. By his side. In his bed. Forever and ever. Smiling at him, cooking for him, crooning over her animals and making her incessant lists. He wanted her lavender scent surrounding him for all his days.
A want so bone deep he knew he would never have it. Something would change. Something would break. He would turn her away, or she would turn him away.
They would destroy each other, just as their fathers once had.
He could not live under the fear of it. Maybe fear made him a coward, but he saw it differently. He was saving her. He wouldsave her. Once and for all.
So, he would not be touching her. Not tonight. Not again. If she would not be the one to call it, he had to be.
“No.” The refusal was harsh and sharp. Enough that he saw the way she subtly flinched at his blunt response. “It would be a distraction,” he said, though he should have left it at sharp and harsh. “I have some things that must be done before the wedding and honeymoon.”
Her shoulders were stiff, and he waited for some argument. Something cutting. He waited, perhaps even hoped for, some kind offight. A fight would be clear cut. A fight would be easy.
But all she said was, “All right.”
It stabbed like a knife all the same. Her easy acceptance. The understanding in her eyes that she refused to acknowledge there between them.
Then again, so did he.
So they stood staring at each other, both afraid to say the things that needed to be said. Because they were alike, and maybe too much so.
“Are you going to eat before you go?” she asked blandly, some of that old ice he hadn’t seen in weeks now seeping into her tone.
Guilt tried to take root inside his chest, but he refused to let it. “No. Thank you.” He moved away from the kitchen, toward the exit. He had to get out. He had to change the trajectory of all of this.
And he knew… He knew just how he could do it. What would be best for all of them. He would save her.
“Luciano.” Her voice was firm, chilly and it brooked no argument.
He stopped at the exit. He didn’t want to look at her, but when she said nothing, he felt like he had to.
Her gaze was direct, but not icy. There was that softness he hadn’t imagined Serena Valli capable ofbefore, though now he realized that was the real core of her. Under all that frigid perfection was this gloriously sweet and caring woman. How she could be both the harsh businesswoman and the softhearted animal lover, completely unafraid to be herself in private, made zero sense to him.
It twisted him into a million knots, and a man could not live with these knots choking him. He could not live with the expectation of a woman like her upon him.
He would never, ever meet it.
So he would save her. He would save her from this. It became a mantra in his head, repeating. If he ran. If he broke it all, she would be free and saved.
“We’re getting married tomorrow,” she said, very seriously.
He looked at her. She was beautiful. Wonderful. Soft and lovely. So damn smart it hurt. He wanted her. Every night. Every day.
