Lili felt a gentle rocking motion and then prodding against her bare shoulder. She was face-planted into the pillow, unable to move. She made a sound in her throat to signify she was semi-conscious.
Cassian’s voice. ‘Time to get up, we have an event to go to.’
Lili made another sound that she hoped conveyed what she meant which was:Huh?
As if Cassian had understood perfectly he said, ‘The charity event at the Hotel de Paris.’
Lili moved her head to the side and without opening her eyes said, ‘It’s your fault I’m not able to move.’
There was a low chuckle that had a decidedly evil edge to it. She cracked open one eye and scowled at him. He was bare-chested, hair damp, and smelled amazing. He’d just showered. A spurt of awareness sent tingles through her blood, waking her up a little.
Then he said, ‘I got you something to wear.’
Lili turned over on her back and saw how his eyes went to her breasts. She shamelessly let him look, hoping she might distract him enough to forget about an event. But he lifted his gaze back to hers and said, ‘Nice try,witch.’
He went to the dressing room and came back holding up a dress on a hanger. Lili absently pulled the sheet up over her chest and sat up, blinking. It was the beautiful green slinky dress Cassian had spotted in the window of a boutique in Como.
Strappy with the deep vee and a generous slit over one leg. It looked miniscule on the hanger. She said, ‘That’ll never fit me.’
‘Try it. I’ve asked someone from a local salon to come and help get you ready.’
He hung it behind the door and then said, ‘The beautician will be here in twenty minutes.’
Lili squeaked and jumped out of bed, pulling the sheet around her and trailing it behind her as she made her way to the bathroom.
* * *
An hour later Cassian was allowing himself a small shot of whiskey but this, he felt, would be permittable on a race weekend when he would obviously never normally drink. But, he was still fizzing with an overload of pleasure endorphins after making love to Lili for the entire afternoon. Again and again until they were spent.
Contrary to that first time they’d made love—now there was nowhere he couldn’t touch her. She was expressive, responsive and tactile. And generous. His mind threatened to blank just at the memory of how she’d taken him in her mouth, her eyes on his as those plump lips had surrounded him in heat and suction and mind-blowing pleasure.
She kept surprising him. And, she was the first woman he’d ever brought with him to a race. He’d always kept his personal life strictly away from the track. But he wanted her here.He needed her.It was as if she’d become some sort of touchstone that he had to keep near him.
And, something she’d said earlier kept reverberating in his head. Her observation about how the racing crew were like his family. When she’d said that he’d felt himself tense in rejection at the very notion.
Ever since his family died, he’d vowed never to need family again. Loving meant losing and he’d resigned himself to being on his own to avoid that horrific grief and sense of abandonment. Self-protection, yes, but also due to a sense of guilt that he’d survived and they hadn’t. On some level he’d always felt he didn’t deserve to aspire to that kind of happiness again.
And yet, Lili had a point that he couldn’t deny. The racing crewhadbecome like his family. And he’d let that happen in spite of his best efforts to shut everyone else out. Certainly lovers had never come close.Until now.
It was disconcerting to acknowledge that he’d found himself creating some kind of a family around him. Because they really were. He’d put Ricardo’s sons through university. He’d paid medical bills for another crew member’s parent’s cancer treatment. He’d watched their children grow up. And, he’d stayed loyal to the same team since he’d started racing. He was invested in their care and lives in a way that he could see now was like some sort of a web of connections. Care. Interest.Love.
On that very disturbing note, he heard a sound and looked to the doorway and almost dropped the glass out of his hand. Lili was standing there, in the dress. It seemed to have been poured onto her body. Glittering. Every curvaceous inch was glorified and celebrated. There was a cutout over one hip. The straps of the dress highlighted the line of her shoulders and toned arms. The vee dipped between the curves of her perfect breasts. Breasts he could still taste on his tongue.
Her hair was down and loose and wild but clipped back from her face. She wore minimal jewelry. She didn’t need it. She looked fierce. Cassian had the very unfamiliar urge to go and kneel before her and ask her…what?He shook his head to try and restore some sense of sanity and she said, ‘I know, it’s too tight, isn’t it?’
He realised she’d misinterpreted his gesture and put out a hand. He put the glass down and walked towards her. ‘No. You should never take it off again. It’s perfect. You’re…perfect.’
She blushed. Her eyes were huge and very blue. ‘Are you sure?’
Cassian nodded. ‘I have never been more sure of anything in my life.’ And he realised it in that moment. And he knew he wasn’t talking about her dress anymore. From the minute he’d seen this woman waiting on that small pier, his life had become…less noisy. Less about the pain of the past, even as their whole marriage was designed to preserve a part of his past.
It had become more about the present. He had to face the fact that at no point had he felt the need to check if Lili might be pregnant yet, so that he could move on with his life. Let her move back to the villa and get on with hers.And their child. It was as if he was deliberately avoiding having to deal with what he would do, if she were pregnant. Because that would spell the end of this, wouldn’t it? After all, that was the goal here. Nothing more.
More.
‘Cass? Are you okay?’
Cassian blinked. Lili said with endearing shyness, ‘You look very handsome too.’
