When they got back to the apartment Cassian had to take some business calls and so Lili, feeling restless after all of the adrenaline she’d just witnessed, went out for a walk. It had been so long since she’d felt…free.
Although, she had a sharp reminder that her demons weren’t altogether gone when a group of young people were suddenly behind her, crowding her, trying to get past and she had a sudden spike of panic, her heart rate zooming sky-high. She let them pass and sat down on a nearby bench, waiting for her heart rate to settle.
She’d come so far in the last weeks but this was a reminder that she still had a ways to go.
As she sat there, she saw a sign for a pharmacy nearby and instinctively put a hand to her belly. There was still no sign of her period. She got up and went over and, telling herself she was just being cautious, she bought an over-the-counter early pregnancy test.
When she was back in the apartment, Cassian was still on the phone in his office. Lili put the pregnancy test under some clothes in her bag and forgot about it.
* * *
By the following evening, after another visit to the track with Cassian, Lili was beginning to feel like a pro when it came to racing—and she had yet to see a live race! She’d met Cassian’s teammate, a Frenchman who was very intense. She was being treated almost as one of the team by his team and it made her feel more emotional than she’d like to admit, another reminder of how her own family had consistently shut her out.
She could understand the allure of this tight-knit world that Cassian was part of.
She’d commented earlier, as they’d driven back to the apartment in his car, ‘It’s like a family. Your team.’
He’d looked at her but shades had been covering his eyes. ‘What do you mean?’
‘You’ve been with them since you started racing. It’s all about loyalty and they love you. I think Ricardo thinks of you as a son.’
A muscle in Cassian’s jaw had popped and he’d said tightly, ‘He has a son. Two sons.’
Lili had shrugged. ‘I know more than anyone that family bonds don’t necessarily mean much. You make your family and you’ve created a family out of this world. Your team.’
Cassian had changed the subject, clearly not enthusiastic about her take on his chosen profession. He’d been conducting some online business meetings and so Lili had taken advantage of the apartment’s pool to soak up some sun and force herself to relax even though it went against the grain.
She’d found that Eloisa had packed some swimwear—not her white one-piece but a white bikini. Lili had put it on telling herself she’d look ridiculous, falling out of it all over the place but it was actually very flattering and supportive.
When she heard a sound nearby her skin prickled with awareness. Footsteps stopped abruptly. Lili opened her eyes and squinted up at Cassian who was standing a few feet away.
She stopped breathing. He was wearing nothing but snug white swimming shorts. Showcasing every delectable inch of his olive-hued and honed body.
His voice sounded a bit strangled. ‘It looks like we’re matching.’ And then, ‘Dio, Lili, I had fantasies about the swimsuit but you’ve just surpassed them.’
Lili wished she was sophisticated enough to stand up gracefully and sashay over to Cassian, take him by the hand and render him insensible with her sexual prowess but she was still very much a blushing novice learning at the hands of a master.
She sat up and pulled her knees up. ‘You don’t look bad yourself.’
He put out a hand. ‘I’m hot. Join me in the pool?’
Blood fizzing now, Lili got up from the lounger with as much grace as she could muster and went over to Cassian. His eyes were glowing. But she didn’t take his hand. She kept walking to the deep end of the pool and after pulling her hair up into a rough knot on her head, she dove in and swam underwater all the way to the other end.
She surfaced just in time to see Cassian execute a perfect dive and within seconds hands were around her calves and tugging her back under. She sucked in a deep breath and met him underwater.
They kissed, floating in time and space, until they had to breathe and came up for air. Lili’s arms and legs were wrapped around Cassian. He backed her up against the wall and she leaned back.
He smoothed his hands down her back, easily undoing her bikini top and dispensing with it. His gaze was hot and devoured her and then he lowered his head and surrounded one taut peak with his hot mouth, making her writhe against him.
He broke away, cheeks flushed. ‘So much for taking a swim, I can think of another activity I’d prefer.’
Lili was breathless. Needy. ‘Me too.’
Cassian let her go and hauled himself out of the pool, reaching her her and pulling her up. They went straight to the bedroom and within seconds he was inside her, filling her, stretching her and Lili knew that she’d never know this kind of exquisite pleasure again. It made her feel emotional.
She moved against him to make the emotion go back where it belonged, but it stayed, high in her chest and throat, stinging her eyes, as Cassian moved within her until she was arching her back against him and pleading for release. And only in that moment of oblivion was the emotion eclipsed.
* * *
