Cassian made a face. ‘Much as I hate to admit it, he’s probably right and Dante loathes the press about as much as I do so he wouldn’t say we should court it, lightly.’
Lili’s insides twisted. ‘And if we didn’t, would it get worse?’
He looked at her. ‘It might…especially if there’s not much else going on.’
The waiter came by with the check and Cassian settled up. He stood up and held out a hand and then at the last moment he pulled it back and said, ‘Sorry, I wasn’t thinking.’
But Lili had an image in her head of watching Dante and Alicia kiss and she said, ‘No, it’s fine.’ She put out her hand and let him take it. And kept holding it as she stood and they left. Walking down the street he interlaced his fingers with hers. A more intimate hold. A shot of pure lust went straight between Lili’s legs. She blushed.
Cassian was looking at her. ‘What are you thinking about?’
She shook her head. ‘About how you affect me…’ She sent him a quick glance. ‘Is it normal? To feel so…needy?’
* * *
Cassian stopped walking and looked at Lili. All evening he’d found it hard to take his eyes off her. She’d looked like she was concentrating so hard while talking to Dante’s wife, Alicia. And then she would smile and it lit up her face in a way that stopped his breath.
And then when she’d had their smallest child on her lap, a look of pure awe and wonder had come over her face. He’d never known a woman like her.
But now she said, ‘Actually don’t answer that, you’ve probably already lost interest and I wouldn’t blame you, I mean, I’m completely inexperienced and not elegant and—’
Cassian put a finger very gently to Lili’s mouth. He ached to replace it with his mouth but they hadn’t kissed there yet and for the first time in his life he realised why it was considered such an intimate act and he marvelled at how easily he’d kissed women before. Without even thinking. Taking it for granted.
She’d stopped talking, eyes wide. He said, ‘Yes, it is entirely normal, when the chemistry between two people is as strong as it is with us. And yes, I still want you, Lili.’
‘Oh.’
‘I can show you when we go home if you like?’
Her cheeks coloured and she sounded a little breathless when she said, ‘Okay.’
Cassian led her back to the car and he said, ‘I’ll drive if you like, I didn’t have much to drink.’
‘Okay.’
They got into the car and navigated their way out of the village and back along the lakeshore to the villa. It struck Cassian then that this was the longest amount of time he’d spent in the villa since his family had died. And it had crept up on him without noticing.
Obviously circumstances had led to this but he found that driving back to the villa now with Lili in the car beside him was the closest he’d come to a sense of peace in a long time. If ever.
That revelation was disconcerting but not enough to distract him from how much he wanted to be naked with Lili as soon as possible. So he focused on that and not on the fact that his life seemed to be deviating alarmingly far from its course.
* * *
When they reached the villa, before they got out of the car, Lili turned to Cassian and said impulsively, ‘If it would help to be seen in public at a couple of things, I don’t mind.’
He looked at her, frowning. ‘You don’t have to, it’s not part of the agreement. Something else will come along to take the press’s interest.’
Lili shrugged a little. She wasn’t ready to fully admit that there was something deep inside her that felt almost compelled to out herself as Cassian’s wife. That maybe she wasn’t prepared to hide herself away in the villa like some sort of secret wife.
‘I’ll leave it up to you. If you think it’s necessary, I’ll do it.’
He considered her for a moment and then said, ‘There’s an event in a week, in Milan. I have a board meeting and then there’s the charity Corti ball, a philanthropic event we host every year. There’ll be a lot of people there, Lili, a big crowd.’
The thought of it sent that tendril of fear down her spine but she forced herself to say, ‘I haven’t been such a recluse all the time. I’ve navigated crowds, I’ve just avoided them where possible but I don’t want to spend my life in the shadows anymore. If I have a child I don’t want to limit their life because of my…issues.’
Cassian looked at her. ‘You’re brave, you know that?’
Lili felt like squirming.‘I’m not really,’ she protested.
