Page 15
“You could apologize for hiding who you were this whole time.”
He continues to rub his face, looking extremely uncomfortable. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you.”
His apology doesn’t really take away any of the sting. “Did you really think I’d never find out?”
“I don’t know. I guess I thought…” He shrugs. “You seemed okay with the way things were. I thought it would continue that way after the wedding.”
“That’s why I came here to talk to you. I wasn’t okay with it. I never was. I’ve spent the last few months trying to be okay with it, because I knew how much our parents wanted us to be together, but I can’t pretend that it’s okay anymore. And now I know there’s truly no point in even trying.”
Eric swallows hard. “Do you hate me?”
“No. I don’t hate you. I’m mad at you, but I don’t hate you.”
“I never meant to hurt you,” he says again.
“Well, you did.” I press my tongue into the side of my cheek and look away, hot angry tears threatening my eyes. I wasn’t in love with Eric, but that doesn’t mean this isn’t still painful. God, I feel like such a fool. I should have realized the truth sooner. At the very least, I should have valued myself more. I should have listened to my gut and done what I wanted instead of what others wanted me to do.
If I had, my life wouldn’t be the upended mess that it is now.
5
SHAW
There’s a red light blinking on my answering machine.
I notice it the moment I get to the bakery this morning. Throwing the door closed behind me, I go straight over to the machine and press the button to listen to the message.
“Hi, Shaw. It’s Juliet. I’m very sorry to do this, but I need to cancel the wedding cake order. My circumstances have…changed. I know I already put down a deposit and I understand that I won’t be getting that back. Again, I’m sorry. Okay. Bye.”
I have to listen to the message a second time before I understand that she’s telling me that her wedding has been called off.
At least that’s what I think she’s saying. Isn’t it?
Yeah. Has to be. There’s a rawness in her voice that wouldn’t be there otherwise.
Hearing the hurt in her voice cuts me to my core. I find no joy in the fact that she’s now a single woman. All I can think about is the pain she must be going through right now.
And all I want is to go to her. Comfort her. Be her person.
But I don’t think that’s what she wants.
In the days that follow, I’m completely off my game. I keep messing up batches of dough. I accidentally give customers too much change. I almost grab a searing hot baking sheet out of the oven with my bare hands.
I keep hoping that Juliet will walk into my bakery, but every time the door opens, it’s someone else.
And yet my hope persists. Every time the bells ring, I look up with anticipation. Every time I’m walking around town, I keep an eye out for her.
Too many times, I think it’s her, only to realize it’s just my mind playing tricks on me.
After a while, it feels like she was a mirage that never actually existed at all.
A few weeks later, I’m sitting alone at The Paddock when I find myself looking at the poster for the outdoor movie series. One of the movies, some kind of romantic comedy, is showing tonight. I don’t think anything of it and go back to my beer.
But then I find myself looking at the poster again. And I remember the excitement on Juliet’s face when she was looking at it, too.
Which is why, after paying my tab, I go over to the park.
What is usually an empty park at this time of day is currently packed. There’s a large projector screen set up, and tons of people are spread out across the grass, sitting on picnic blankets and low lawn chairs. A few vendors are selling snacks on the side of the park, infusing the air with the scent of buttery popcorn and sugary desserts.
